Last time I met with Dr. G, she was telling me to work on thinking with both my logical side & my emotional side. When I’m all logical, I’m cold to what my emotions are trying to teach me. When I’m all emotional, I can’t see the truth due to the fog. “Ideally, you want to find a healthy balance between the two.”
She knows I’m all or nothing. She knows this is a challenge for me. A healthy balance? How the hell do I do that? Ugh. Therapy. So much work. And she just points me in the right direction. She doesn’t tell me the answer. Dammit. 😉
So that’s what I’ve been working on lately. Whenever I’m approached with a situation, whatever side kicks in first, the other pulls it back (or at least tries to). For example, my coworker for Job #1 is a real dumbass. Emotionally, I want to bite his self-absorbed head off. Logically, I realize he’s just an idiot. Like legit. Meth has fried whatever little brain cells he had left (no, seriously). He’s not smart enough to be cold & calculating. Knowing this, it helps me to have more patience with him when I’m telling him something for the 4th time. See? Balance.
It’s definitely work in progress. I do fail, fuck up, & look back to say, “Maybe I should’ve been more compassionate? Maybe I should’ve been more objective?” It’s making me more aware of my initial reactions & to work on my self-discipline.
Like I said, it’s a lot of work.
finding my truth 