It’s that time of the year again. A little earlier than last year but I’m there & ready to go.
I have no idea where I want to start all of this. I feel like this:
Here’s what I’ve been dealing with…
CAREER
- Job #1 is REALLY pissing me off. I told Boss I had 2 family friends die this past week & he’s like, “That sucks…so here’s what I want” & cut hours for this week for the holiday. You insensitive prick. I’ve been flooded with work & I’m like, “Hey, fucker. Maybe you shouldn’t drop our hours when it’s hotter than Satan’s asshole outside & this is our time to shine.” So after I handle a shit load of calls & work & talk people off the edge, he tells me to move them ALL to a different day. No. Fuck you. I told him respectfully no & that it would piss everyone off, myself included. I haven’t heard anything since then. We’ll see how he takes it. I’m done dealing with these last minute changes & trying to roll with his ADHD.
- Job #2 is fine. I have a class tonight with Grumpy Grandma as I’ve nicknamed her. I’m teaching an adult class for a local college (woo hoo!) & this one student is just a crabby old bitch. One of these, “I guess this is fine…” Bitch, IDGAF. You’re in my class. We’re gonna do this my way. Thankfully, I only see her tonight & next week. And then I’m done. She might take my year-long class but I’ll nip her attitude quickly if she does. Respect goes both ways.
SOCIAL
- I went through my FB list & cleaned house. I demoted so-called friends, promoted ones who actually care & take 2 minutes out of their day to talk to me, & unfriended, yet again, those who SWORE they were different but they weren’t. Once everything was all sunshine & roses, they were gone. Shocker. I’m so over being a free therapist &/or a relationship counselor. I’m more than that.
- I’m also over hearing how much worse everyone has it. Life is not a pissing contest. Why is your suffering greater than mine or someone else’s? Like I’ve been told, “No, this is worse.” What the fuck. I’m just trying to relate. Goddamn. I don’t play those games. I’m like, “Fine. You win.” Enjoy your arrogance & pride.
PHYSICAL
- Alright. I’m done. I can’t live like this anymore. I’m at the point where I’m in a lot of pain because this is too much weight to carry. I’m only 5’5″ & I’m probably around 60-70 lbs overweight. I’m not one of those, “More to love!” women. When I’m popping meds every today & wishing I could take a weekly massage, change needs to happen. I’ve been thinking about this quote a lot so I’m gonna give this a shot:
So yeah. That’s where I’m at. I really want to flip the world off & hermit away for 6 months. Maybe I can do a modified version of that? I mean, just really pull back? Hmm… I’ll have to think about it & try to figure out a plan. But for now, I’m cleaning house. I’m done dealing with bullshit & being understanding. Fuck it & fuck them.
THISSSS
finding my truth 