I know this picture has nothing to do with kindness but I thought it was just so beautiful! ❤
In the midst of my self-reflection lately, I was thinking about kindness & how often we should extend it. I do my best to show kindness to everyone & to be patient with them. Not just because it’s my resolution, but also because we’re breathing, living beings. The world is dark & cold enough. I want to be a candlelight in someone’s darkness, to bring a little light & a little warmth. 🙂
Like everyone else, I do have a limit. If the person is rude or demanding, my kindness will only go so far before my inner “fuck-it-o-meter” goes off. 😉
But what about the other side of it? Like when the pendulum swings & my kind words are falling on deaf ears. And to me, I’m starting to wonder where that line is & how to recognize it before I lose self-control or I end up with a broken heart.
I think the reason I’ve been thinking about this is that I’m curious if I’m wasting my time with certain people. I’m constantly extending kindness, patience, & love to them. And for what? Karma? Goodness? Acceptance? This deep belief I have that everyone just needs some hope & love? I’m not sure. But I do know that I can’t stop. I have this compulsion to be a better person than who I was yesterday.
I got into a, let’s call it a “disagreement,” with DD yesterday. 😉 Nobody was yelling or crying so I wouldn’t call it a fight but we’re definitely two halves on this coin. There is a situation regarding a person & they believe I should walk away from it. Cut my ties & don’t look back. They think I give this person “too much credit” & that I “put them on a pedestal.” However, I disagree. I look at it as me believing the good in someone & being a patient friend. This person isn’t an asshole nor have they been rude to me. They’ve been very kind & very understanding. Why would I walk away? Because of the situation, things are delicate, yes, but I don’t believe that would be grounds for leaving the relationship. I’m not a fair-weathered friend.
I normally wouldn’t give it a second thought but now my mind is flooded with questions: is that noble or naive of me? Should I continue to show kindness? Or am I too close to the situation to see if my emotions are being abused? Is all of my kindness & patience for nothing? Am I wasting my time? Where is that line, the balanced center? And how do I know if I’ve crossed it?
I honestly don’t know.
4 Replies to “Kindness”
Mrs W here. I know most people rely on feelings for this (if they get too hurt or if they feel like the relationship isn’t making them happy, they move on or confront). I don’t know what your emotional spectrum is like, but I can’t (obviously) rely on this. So I create my own limits. Whatever the offense is, I tend to give people the benefit of the doubt once, then warn them at the second offense, and retaliate at the third (it needn’t be anything harmful, moving on is one of my best options. I think I’ll make a post about this, do you mind if I do?
Moving on is one of my favorites. I try to believe the best about others. Even if they’ve been complete assholes to me (unprovoked), I try to give them the benefit of the doubt, & if need be, walk away.
By all means! 🙂
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I did done it. You can check it out if you’re interested, I’m not certain I stayed on track but it’s a complicated subject for me 😉
It is complicated!