Treat. Yo. Self.

Every time I hear this phrase or I get a massage or anything similar to pampering myself, I think of this incredible scene from Parks & Rec. If you haven’t already powered through it on Netflix, you should do that. Season 1 is rough but necessary to the story, much like other series.

ANYWAY

Today’s post isn’t about P&R but about me hitting a milestone today. I got a massage as I have been doing every two weeks for the past few months. I’ve mentioned before how it’s more like physical therapy for me to help correct my back, alignment, relieve pain, & whatever else I may need.

At the end of our appointment today, my therapist said, “Okay, SC, I think you’ve made really great progress! We’re down to small knots in your shoulders now. I think we can meet in 2 weeks & then monthly after that if you want.”

Wait, what?! SERIOUSLY?! You mean I’m actually IMPROVING?!

I’ve noticed I’m not in that much pain anymore but I didn’t want to get my hopes up. I might still go every 2 weeks or maybe I’ll make it every 3. I’ve never been told by a PT or LMT or doctor of any kind that I’m making “great progress.” I’ve been given a laundry list of fuck-ups & I’ve never seen the end. Like a moving goal post, I’ve never crossed that finish line. It’s always been just out of reach. I’m left feeling discouraged & broken. This is the first time someone else has recognized a positive change.

I’ll be honest – I felt guilty for “treating myself” to massages. But then I had a happy thought: my health is worth it. Both my physical & mental health are benefiting from me taking some time to relax & work on some things. Even when I’m on the table, my mind is swirling about random situations that have happened to me recently. Those who have wronged me, those who I have wronged, how I lost control, how I can improve, & so on. I work on forgiving others, forgiving myself, & try to be a positive influence on their lives. All while someone is graciously working on my back so I can move again. 🙂

It’s only a matter of time now before I start seeing changes in other parts of my life. If you see any change, please let me know. It’s vital to me. As you know, I get in my head. Sometimes I need someone who’s not me to say, “Hey, you’re doing great!”

Oh, happy day! 🙂